


Animus

by lucymordy



Category: H.I.V.E. Series - Mark Walden
Genre: Dissociation, Other, Short One Shot, that's basically it, uhh enjoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 20:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7453477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucymordy/pseuds/lucymordy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which Raven is injected with Animus<br/>(happens sometime in the beginning of Zero Hour, I believe?)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Animus

Some wise person once said that everybody deals with trauma in a different way, unique to themselves. Raven didn’t remember who, nor did she bother to take the time to find it out. Her brain’s own method of oasis was no new thing to her, not after so long of participating in her line of work. But what surprised her was how it manifested the moment that needle emptied its contents into her bloodstream.

It wasn’t quick, nor was it painless. It tore at her vessels and ripped through her veins and twitched into her nerves. She screamed into the Tokyo darkness, and the liquid deep inside of her screamed back. But through it all, Raven felt the telltale distance. Her brain began to back her into a corner, and her orders were issued before she could fully comprehend that she was disconnecting.

Raven was used to her consciousness pulling away from her body. It happened often during intense fights or scenes of destruction that her brain wasn’t used to seeing.  
Just a few months ago, she could recall being tortured by the twin assassin in H.O.P.E.’s Amazonian headquarters; but only through a veil of fog and surrealism. Because she hadn’t been there when ghost had been digging raven’s own swords into her- maybe physically, but not mentally.

Large portions of her time in The Glasshouse had been spent dissociating, so much that she didn’t try to remember anything about her childhood there unless information was needed. The entire experience was embedded in her memory resembling a horrible nightmare, nothing she would experience in consciousness.

It wasn’t the logical events that bothered her, though. Raven understood why her mind would make her past traumatic events seem unreal. No, it was the episodes in calm everyday life that truly frightened her.

The days when she woke up and felt like she was still in a dream, despite running her hands along the dark bed sheets and feeling the grooves in the hilts of her swords and the textures and how tangible each was.

The midday crises in which her consciousness would simply float away from her body until she was sure that she wasn’t the one in control, despite her limbs responding to her commands with no delay.

The random occasions when she was piloting a shroud and couldn’t quickly process what she was doing or where she was going, despite her body still controlling the plane by instinct.

She couldn’t help but compare what she was experiencing now- with the Animus liquid seizing control of her muscles and pushing her out- to her mortifying spells of unreality.  
And it scared the hell out of her.


End file.
